Yeah, then get out of bed to pee like 4 times
Or don’t. Its happy hour somewhere.
When i was in my 20s people always asked me how I stayed so skinny. “Have you tried being poor and being an alcoholic?”
You’re not a true beer connisuer unless you wake up positively shaking with excitement about having your next beer.
As a brain surgeon, I agree. *sips*
A bucket of milk with some coffee and a lot of sugar is a great breakfast! You’ll have great shits, too, especially if you combine it with the beer-only dinner!
This is my weight loss secret.
Adult. Diapers.
*taps head meme*
Go commando + Swim shorts + Crocs
You’re welcome. No more costly diapers!
Plus a free liquid leg tan!
a muumuu is traditional
Ahhhh, that’s where I went wrong, I was drinking 8 bourbons.
If that’s not enough
“Almost”
Interestingly, the calorie counts on food packaging are derived from the Atwater system (and later modifications) that estimate digestible calories from the amount of fat, protein and carbohydrates in each food item. These numbers are based on experimental research on food substitution and weight loss/gain done in the late 1800s and early 1900s. The calorie counts for alcohol are similarly based on the measurable amount of alcohol in each drink, except that the number used (7 kcal per g) was just a complete guess on Atwater’s part since they couldn’t do equivalent substitution experiments involving booze.
When I need to eat but don’t want to put in any effort: half a cup of rice, half a cup of lentils, two cups stock (I use veggie stock, but you can use chicken, beef, etc.) Season with whatever you have in your spice drawer that looks good. Bring the water to a boil then lower the heat to low and let it simmer covered for 20-ish minutes. It’s bland but filling, lentils provide protein, it’s ready in less time than it would take to get delivery, and you don’t have to watch it. Rice and lentils will keep in your cabinet forever. You can get stock paste or boullion that keeps a long time too.
You can still have two beers, but now you’re not drinking on an empty stomach.
Your “no effort” meal, sounds like a lot of effort to me.
My low effort meal is “open packet, put ready meal in oven or microwave”
This is low effort and cheap and relatively healthy compared to those microwave dinners though, a big bag of rice and lentils doesn’t cost much and is shelf stable for a year easily
What you’re saying isn’t untrue, but if I’m drunk I shouldn’t be in control of fire.
Massively cheaper and almost certainly better for you, yes - but arguably not as low effort as “beep beep beep, ping”.
Put the rice and lentils in a packet. You could also make this in a microwave. A rice cooker would work too.
This is easier than mac and cheese from a box.
This is literally the same amount of effort.
I do appreciate that the listed recipe is “relatively quick and simple”, but I’m not convinced by “literally the same effort”.
If it was, then why would anyone buy the millions of frozen/boxed/packeted “just put it in the oven for 30 minutes” or “just put it in the microwave for 2 minutes” meals? They’re not buying them for the high-quality taste, surely?
In my experience most of the time it’s because nobody ever taught them. They grew up with shitty parents that made them think rice and beans are only for yucky brown people.
You know, I keep wondering this, because it genuinely is a similar amount of work. It’s just putting two dry and one wet thing in a pot. It takes me maybe 3 minutes. You don’t even have to do the ‘bring to a boil, then turn the heat down’ bit the other person described. Just turn on medium heat and leave it be. I’d probably take longer reading the package instructions and following them correctly on something ready made.
That said, I’ve gotten ready made meals for lunch when my work only had a microwave and no real kitchen.
I put rice and lentils in a rice cooker, then eat with peanuts and aioli. Add microwaved frozen soy beans / corn if I’m feeling fancy. 5 minutes preparation, 20 minutes of wait.
As a depressed person myself this a big part of my diet.
I am 35. I will absolutely regret this.
Should’ve stayed 22 😕
Fuck, why didn’t I try that
Damn, shouldnt have downloaded the latest update
Im in my 40s. Two beers is not enough for regret… But regret is normally the reason for two beers.
Yeah early 30s here… I’d probably wake up having to pee around 3am and then toss and turn until I need to wake up because of the glutamate rebound lol.
At 50 you regret reading the words “2 beers”
400-600 calories. Decent nutrition and plenty of hydration. Dinner of champions.
The only acceptable substitution is 30-40 olives
Hold my beer, going back for more olive.
I drink two beers in the morning, I drink two beers at night, I drink two beers in the afternoon, and then I feel alright!
I drink two beers in times of peace, and two in times of war; I drink two beers before I drink two beers, and then I drink two more!
My friends say I have a drinking problem. A drinking problem! What drinking problem? I drink, I get drunk, I fall down. No problem!
A 40 ounce to freedom is the only chance I have to feel good, even though I feel bad
People stop at 2?
In this economy
Start at 2
Maybe in mediveal times when it was still mostly carbs except germs can’t survive inside as much anymore.
Modern beers are definitely too strong. I’ve been thinking about mixing alcoholic and non-alcoholic beer of the same brand to approximate a more reasonable beer, but I usually just end up drinking either only non-alcoholic beer or a cocktail without any beer.
Drei bier ist auch ein schnitzel und dann hast du nichts getrunken.
Three beers are also a schnitzel and then you drank nothing.
I don’t speak German, but this phrase spoke to me.
