‘please, Internet, tell me how to turn my game controller into a vibrator’
Kids these days… Back in my day, we just turned on FF8 and spammed summons
Oh God, I literally quit the game because the summons were so absurd. I feel I spent more time watching the same animations than I did playing the game.
I imagine that’s a design consideration.- same with Ultima and other big spells. You get a big payoff after a big wind-up. It’s trying to telegraph that if you want speed you should build your party differently using junctions
game designers be like: NO! REBUILD YOUR PARTY IF YOU DON’T LIKE SUMMON ANIMATIONS! WE WILL NOT PUT A SKIP BUTTON IN!!!
honestly I don’t hate it as a decision. there should be rewards for using all the mechanics well
At least there was button tapping to power up so there was SOMETHING to do during the forever animations
Oooooh Shiva, you can be my ice queen any day
Just use Buttplug.io
We were vibe coding before it was cool.
OOP should just hump a Furby like a normal person
Idk if borderlands is on Playstation but in 2 and 3 moxxie gives you a gun that turns your controller into a vibrator
To be fair, having recently been on the market for a proper vibrating sex toy, they’re expensive as fuck, and according to my ex-wife (ow. ex- still stings.) capable of providing mind-blowing orgasms. So yeah, for those without a budget, we make do with what we got, or the bargain bin at Good Vibes.
TMI:
spoiler
The item in question doesn’t figure into why she’s ex- now, but the reason we were on the market for one absolutely does. I’ll be talking to an endocrinologist at the end of the year.
lol bros never polished his knob with a hitachi
They’re not more than a new controller for the basic rabbit style vibrating ones. Controllers start around $60 in USA. I could be off, I got two Xbox controllers a few years ago to play couch games via steam, I don’t own a console.
Controllers in 2015 were about $40 for a Playstation standard and could get up to $200 depending on the features you wanted (e.g. wireless, self charging, extended range, game domination features, etc.)
Most people have a $10-$30 market for sex toys until they get serious about it. Kids exploring their bits don’t have any budget at all, and can only get things that pretend to be toys for kids.
Evidently, it’s appropriate to get your tween a vibrating broomstick (or a bumble ball if you’re a California hippy parent who wants to assure your toddler grows up well-adjusted) but not a vibrating rubber duckie. I’m not fully sure why.
You can probably get something serviceable in that price range, but tbh the magic wand is about $100 and yeah it’s a “have a job” toy, but it’s the sort of toy that people don’t think of as “seriously getting into sex toys” toy. Though I will say that category does have several subdivisions once you’re in it. There’s a wide gulf between people who have a few vibrators and a strap on and the people who own a sybian
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This is not an ad I just really like the magic wand an for 69 dollars it’s a steal.
A friend of mine had to vibrate the snot out of her leg as part of PT (it’s a very long and gruesome story), and for stuff like that magic-wand type vibes are great. But the new orgasmotron vibes use weird biofeedback science and fancy rhythms to get the pulse just right for people who have various kinds of sexual dysfunction.
Some of them also relay your health issues back to the App provider to be added to your consumer profile and sold, so do use IoT security and try not to get ones that sell your info.
On one hand that sounds awesome, on the other hand that sounds so expensive its probably on par with a good tens unit which would also double as a muscle relief device.
Play borderlands 2 and get the guns from moxxi one of the vibrates constantly when equipped
As I played it with mouse and keyboard, I never got to experience the rumble effects of Moxxi’s gear.
long and hard
Wouldn’t a vibrator be cheaper
Back in my day, people used the REZ vibrator accessory.
I bought one in like 2006, and still have it! You could also plug it into the computer, turn vibration to max, and it would go until you closed the program.
Great accessory!
If OP were interested in learning about tech at the same time, they could research an easy way to call the controller API with a simple button / toggle in a project, possibly writing their own controller-to-vibrator App, e.g. in Godot.
Sackboy? Cyberspunk? Witcher 3: Wild Cunt?
Hilariously, the actual Cyberpunk game would work for this. There’s a weapon in the game that’s just a giant dildo, and holding it causes your controller to rumble continuously.
The trick is to find a game that has a mounted turret with infinite ammo and then tape the button down. The Warthog in Halo, or the Street Sweeper in Mercenaries (with the infinite ammo cheat on).
Just play Trover Saves the Universe and get the Happy Ending.
Just pop over to cvs and get a back massager.
Someone desperate enough to masturbate with a ps5 controller does not have the means to buy anything.
Except apparently a ps5
Unless, say, they did not buy that ps5. Like a child might not buy their own electronics but rather be gifted them. Like a child who might be very hormonal and desperate to masturbate with anything that can vibrate.
I was thinking it might be an embarrassment issue. But that’s a good point. Although PS5 are pretty expensive iirc.
Consider: they did not buy the ps5 themselves because they are an extremely hormonal child.
No help to them now, especially on PS, but the xbox 360 had a game just for this. Well, for neck massages, wink.