Ancient Chinese Proverb found in Fortune Cookie says:

“You can walk on water too, if it is cold enough.”

Hold him under and he’ll panic and turn the water to wine. Kinda like a squid.

Why does Baby Jesus look like Donald Trump?

Just wait until he turns it to wine.

this is really funny. I appreciate this

There’s a great story in i think the pseudepigrapha, where child jesus is playing with his friends and gets upset and turns one of his friends into a pillar of salt and mary comes and yells at him to turn the kid back.

moses was a also a pain to bath

Jesus spoke in parables often, and I ask if the miracle of walking on water was figurative, but Christians that I’ve discussed it with tend to insist it actually happened.

“ln(e) = 1 mom”