• cjoll4@lemmy.world
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    13 days ago

    Matt said: “It was a very embarrassing accident. One of the issues with being so large, especially in hot water showers, is that it’s not exactly easy to see my feet.

    “Especially when I move too fast, it can definitely mess with my balance, too. As I was rushing to get ready for work, I didn’t see the excess shower gel in the tub because my penis was the only thing in my eye line.

    Right, because a fifteen-inch penis is totally going to obstruct your view of both feet and everything else below your waistline, and your dick is totally the reason you clumsily slipped. And you totally aren’t looking for every possible excuse to turn any event of your life into another opportunity to brag about your massive, record-breaking schlong.

    🙄

      • happyfullfridge@lemmy.ml
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        13 days ago

        I’m 100% sure you cannot get an erection if it’s that long, not enough blood in the body to supply it. You should probably get a surgery to make it smaller if you have this

          • happyfullfridge@lemmy.ml
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            12 days ago

            if you are a doctor and have knowledge about it I’m happy to be educated, what I said is conjecture of what seems intuitively true to me personally

            • Øπ3ŕ@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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              11 days ago

              I am not a doctor, nor was I the one spouting room temp BS with an air of familiarity to the topic. What you’ve posted is a half-thought that, especially since you’re presumably holding a device, could’ve been just as quickly pursued to a citable reference you could’ve shared as part of your, now refined comment.

              Think of the children, Doc. 🤌🏼

              • happyfullfridge@lemmy.ml
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                11 days ago

                genuinely looked and there’s not much info or research about extremely large penis actually, if you find something I’m happy to hear it

    • ParadoxSeahorse@lemmy.world
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      12 days ago

      “Especially when I move too fast, it can definitely mess with my balance, too.As I was rushing to get ready for work, I didn’t see the excess shower gel in the tub because my penis was the only thing in my eye line.

      “I slipped on it, causing me to fall out of the tub completely head first and crack my shoulder on the hard floor.I got two fractures as a result.”

      Sounds like he slipped on his penis

  • JamesNZ@lemmy.world
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    13 days ago

    Summary of the article. " By the way I have a massive cock, it is just huge, biggest in the world. Did I say about my massive unit? It is really big…oh I slipped in the shower and broke my arm,…but let’s get back to the massive third leg I have going on. ,"

      • Øπ3ŕ@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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        13 days ago

        FWIW, that brand was specifically designed and marketed for average dicks to feel bigger. It’s their whole thing.

    • 46_and_2@lemmy.world
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      12 days ago

      This dude has been in the news before, and again for some non-story, but thinly veiled trying to spread as much as possible exactly how long and thick his dong was. I mean good for him (or bad, many women’s vaginas won’t accommodate that), but he comes off as attention-seeker of the lowest order.

  • Wispy2891@lemmy.world
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    13 days ago

    Unrelated but this newspaper says:

    Join our WhatsApp! Our community members are treated to special offers, promotions and adverts from us and our partners

    There’s people that are actually saying “hell yes! Send me ads on WhatsApp, here’s my phone number!” ???

    • pyre@lemmy.world
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      12 days ago

      there’s people falling in love with chatgpt, or taking medical advice or therapy from it. I’d take someone who gives away their number to receive ads kind of idiot every day of the week over that kind.

  • MissJinx@lemmy.world
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    12 days ago

    Envious men please remember vaginas do have an ending. Don’t trust hentai, your penis will NOT come out of our mouths

    • ✺roguetrick✺@lemmy.world
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      13 days ago

      Seriously. Dude is acting like he can’t see the floor because his dick is in the way. Be one thing if he had syncope due to blood flow. Just didn’t look.

  • JackLSauce@lemmy.world
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    13 days ago

    …independently measured at [37cm], and a cast of it has been included in a museum in Iceland.

    I have questions for Iceland; mostly about how to pronounce ð but we’ll get to that later

  • RBWells@lemmy.world
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    13 days ago

    Ok that is the most ridiculous explanation I have ever heard. Do you have to see your feet to know where they are? And how do large busted or pregnant women manage then?

    Oof it must suck to be hung that big though. No balls deep in anyone, ever, and careful sex only.

    • T156@lemmy.world
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      13 days ago

      Do people even focus on their body parts that much on the day-to-day? It seems like something that you wouldn’t think about usually.

  • MrSulu@lemmy.ml
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    13 days ago

    The world is full of men that can’t see their own feet in the shower!

  • Imhotep@lemmy.world
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    13 days ago

    my penis was the only thing in my eye line.

    “I slipped on it, causing me to fall out of the tub completely head first

    This makes it sound a bit like he slipped on his peen

    Which I found humorous. Because penis.

  • NutWrench@lemmy.ml
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    13 days ago

    “I slipped on it, causing me to fall out of the tub completely head first and crack my shoulder on the hard floor.I got two fractures as a result.”

    You did NOT slip on your penis.

    • Votes@sh.itjust.works
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      12 days ago

      He didn’t, he said he slipped on shampoo that he couldn’t see since his penis was obscuring his vision.

      • Dasus@lemmy.world
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        12 days ago

        That’s a lame excuse. I’m pretty sure my two legs are larger than his penis and I don’t consider my vision obscured by them.

        Was he slapping himself in the face or why was it so obscuring his vision?

        A better title would be “man so mesmerised by having a large dick, he can’t look away from it even when in slippery spaces”