“Shit or get out of the kitchen” is my current favorite malaphor.
"I’m not the sharpest crayon in the basket. "
“Does the pope shit in the woods?”
I’m not a native English speaker, but in my experience “I don’t have a horse in this race” seems more common.
I’m a native, and I’d agree. But it’s a funny post so, I’ll ignore that.
I prefer, due to my white trash rural roots:
“That dog won’t hunt.”
“I don’t have a horse in this dog”: incoherent, fanciful, drunk
“I don’t have a sea slug in this drive by.” Conjures images of underwater sea violence and muddies your message.
I don’t know. I don’t have a horse in this dogfight. Still working on his pilot’s license.
I don’t have a don’t in this don’t.
This is the true evolution
There’s a YouTuber named Memoria Matters who has an inside joke that she’s trying to popularize the idiom “too many dogs on the dance floor”. I’m pretty sure it doesn’t have any particular meaning, however. It came up quite a few times during her Alien: Isolation let’s play, however.
Dammit, that’s too fantastic to NOT be an idiom
Sounds like the name of the next hit single from Reel Big Fish
“I don’t have a monkey in this circus”
“I don’t have a race-fight in this horse-dog” : questionable morals; supernatural or sci-fi undertones; a good chance for double-takes, perhaps even the odd triple-take
are the Finns okay
Depends whether their cow is in a ditch
I don’t have a fight in this race
Not my circus, not my monkeys.
‘Corn Maze’ by Aesop Rock
“The phone pings from a pillow fort in a corn maze. I don’t have a horse in your war games”
