I wish I could read all of that text clearly
No added preservatives!
THEY ARE ADDED PRESERVATIVES!
I was gonna say. There’s none added because that’s what they are.
“Oops, all preservatives.”
“Oops, all preservatives.”
I think mass-produced factory loaves of bread also should include this on their labels because have you noticed the past couple decades that bread never gets moldy anymore, regardless how long it’s neglected in its plastic packaging?
Exactly, thank you. There are no added preservatives. Just the preservatives, as requested.
purple one is to die for
You know how when you were a kid you’d mix all the flavours from the soda fountain?
Fittingly, we always called that a suicide.
We called it a graveyard, still works lol
Same.
…Why the fuck did we call it that??Dunno… We called it Bonani-Tea
I’ve never heard that one before. Is that pronounced like “boe naan ee tea”? Where did you grow up?
In Germany. I think a friend of mine just made that up, it doesn’t have a meaning but it sounds nice.
If you really wanna nail the pronunciation, you have to say all the vowels straight, no diphthongs. So don’t bent the “o” to an “ou”. Boh-nah-nee comes close.
What, there’s no morticians on this platform to explain exactly what each of these does to a body?
Metaflow Arterial Conditioner looks delicious
It looks like Midori.
People are so toxic that they want to be toxic after they die too.
I just want to be dumped off at the landfill or ground up and used for fertilizer after giving up any useful organs.
Had this conversation recently when my wife died. She wanted to be cremated with no embalming but wanted a visitation. In the US you have to be embalmed to have a visitation. No amount of pleading to just put her in an ice bath would work sadly.
You can’t have a visitation with someone who has been cremated? Are you positive thats not a state specific thing?
Maybe there is something else you can call it? It just surprises me because my grandmother and an uncle where both cremated, and we had services. I thought they were visitations.
I think they meant she wanted her body to be seen before cremation, and the funeral home wouldn’t do that without embalming her.
I see I see. Ok yea that I could believe.
Yea, this is it. Guess it wasn’t s clear. Visitation and then cremation.
because the funereal business is a sham.
can’t have y without x and if you get x you need z. we’ve conveniently packaged it together in our x-z package for a low cost of $6999. isn’t this what the dearly departed would want from you? don’t they deserve the best??
and that’s why I’m a complete fucking asshole. I don’t deserve the best. I deserve to rot in a culvert on the outskirts of the airport.
I mean, sure. You do you.

Imagine getting drunk, breaking into a morgue and seeing this.
Dodge like the car company? gnarly, going for that complete vertical integration achievement
🤘metalflow! 🤘
Looks apple flavored tho
I’d think anything that involved an open casket would be red tinted. Who wants to see grandma in her casket with visibly green veins…
Don’t yuck other people’s yums!
It’s not a leave in conditioner.
We also knew grandma was too old to not be a witch
She always reminded us of a vulcan
grandma had a mean nerve pinch
I’ve got a few of those in my back. TIL I’m Vulcan. Really shouldn’t be too surprised.










