We all know that won’t work. Try this instead.
That’s kind of an insane gift for a first date given how expensive cheese is.
I mean, if he makes it himself or knows the people who do, he probably gets it a lot cheaper than at the store.
True love right there
Fun fact, the digestion of milk/cheese creates casomorphins from caesin, one of the most prominent peptides in milk. Casomorphins can activate opioid receptors. Giving a woman a slice of cheese might work in your benefit if she eats the cheese.
I read that as “a slice of milk” and like. Technically yeah it’s not wrong
Yeah but this one unironically works for a lot of women.
My ex gf and i used to steal each other fancy cheeses. It was the most intense love i have ever felt.
How do you steal each other fancy cheeses? Or steal fancy cheese from each other?
So, you steal a fancy cheese, right? Then you give it to your girlfriend. Then maybe she steals a fancy cheese that reminds her of you and passes it off. Now youve stolen each other fancy cheeses.
From where though? The fancy cheese store? Does every town have one of these for purposes of romantic theft?
It’s called a fromagerie, pleb
Wherever.
Fascinating
🖖
also: username checks out
I like the idea that these are all steps to one process. Like, you gotta steal her shoe and some hair and pins, and the best distraction is with cheese.
I keep stealing shoes, and filling it with rue, but all it’s given me are shouting matches
The stinkier the cheese, the more the fascination!
Written by Coolguy Sexhaver.
That sounds like Strong Bad’s alter ego.
The Cheat is vacuuming.
The Cheat is ovulating.
In the unlikely event that she reacts poorly she might be on her period. You should ask her to make sure though.
Yeah i always take stock and usually calm down when a guy im arguing with points that out.
Community Note: This is actually bad advice that will get you stabbed
You’re right, and I find it hilarious that this needs to be noted.
Can confirm, was stabbed.
That doesn’t sound right but I don’t know anything about women to dispute it.
This has to be satire.
There’s no way that last sentence especially isn’t satire
I thought so too until I went to the website and I still couldn’t tell :/
There’s lots of really fucking stupid people out there so who knows.
It’s not. This has worked on me four times.
We all love some good ol’ mansplainimg.
I have a sudden urge to vacuum, and without ovaries! 😍
Vacuuming? Are you ovulating or something?
So you just like to suck then? ;)
TIL I ovulate every Sunday 😂😅
Where the fuck do you keep all the eggs? Do you have a walk in fridge?
In europe we store our eggs unrefrigerated
The chicken ones, sure, but are all your climates mild enough that they hatch like that?
Congrats! 🎉🎉🌻
Every day here and I don’t even have ovaries!
Possibly like “false pregnancy” in dogs?
I’m in heat thanks to climate change.
Sounds condescending. Why not just compliment her ovipositor?
Madam, my compliments to your ovaries 🎩💪🏼🥚🙇
My dear, your claoca looks especially receptive this fine evening.
Why, thank you, I’ve just been to the remora. And might I say what a stable dorsal fin you have.
Pretty sure that’s my first gag-upvote. Thanks, I guess.
Yes, please do that. So we are immediately aware that we should get away as fast as possible.
The sad thing is that some people will take this advice.
What’s sad about learning something new and getting laid?
Please fertilise my egg, I just vacuumed.
Certainly, m’lady!
I sincerely hope you’re /s ing.
Lol. I hoped that would be obvious.
Hi. Welcome to the Internet.
Have a look around 🎶
Kids these days don’t remember the internet before /s, where you had to use context to tell of someone was being sarcastic or not.
And some woman will have a good laugh and a narrow escape
Rings true to me. My wife never vacuums and is past menopause.
I do all the vacuuming here.
Considering neither me nor the wifey are fertile, I think this is easily debunked and closed, then label as “incel drivel” and thrown into the fire.
Username is definitely relevant. :)
I would consider your comment to be far more truthful and accurate than what is pictured in the OP.
Have a good day.
I feel sorry for any guy dumb enough to try this. Also my friends mom when i was 13 vacuumed every day and rearranged all furniture and vacuumed behind everything once a week.
Wow what a cycle that must have sucked
Damn I guess I’ve never ovulated in my life
