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Transcript
4 Panel Comic
Panel 1: Ron Weasley sits in front of a fireplace with a Gameboy Yellow with Pokémon Red in hand.
Ron: Harry, these muggle games are so fun!
Panel 2: Harry Potter sits across the fireplace from Ron and holds his wand and a Gameboy Red with the screen and wand pointing at Ron.
Potter: Ron, look! My Pokémon is evolving from Abra to Kadabra!
Panel 3: Harry is horrified as magic flies from his wand
Panel 4: Harry comes to the depressing realization of what he’s done.
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I know, fuck Rowling and all that, but let’s talk about whether this could happen in the HP universe. It couldn’t. Thank you for your attention.
Remember their first lesson on Wingardium Leviosa and how important pronunciation and wand control was? It basically isn’t supposed to work if you mispronounce it, and the pronunciation is pretty strict. Also, as we saw from The Half Blood Prince, for dark magic, you really have to cast the spell with intention.
Exfoliate and excoriate the brain of Joanne Transphobe Rowling and all that…
But I appreciate your awareness and sense and deployment of knowledge of the in universe rules (perhaps even to an extent more than the author did).
Lately I’ve tried to come to terms with the fact that I am unable to completely discard a creator’s work just because the creator is or was a horrible person. Like Michael Jackson has got to be thousands of times worse than Rowling, but I can’t stop liking his music.
Ehh, Michael was fucked up by his circumstances and dad… He did terrible things, but I’m not sure how bad he knew he was being to those kids.
Rowling has made it clear any money she makes from a year’s back will be basically fully deployed to actively make trans people, and anyone who might support them, worse off.
But harm and “bad” are all inquantifiable, like all things that matter.
Besides, all of this is a very post-19th century problem where celebrity itself and the parasocial connection with creators has become such a large part of how people self-identify and find community. (As with Capitalism consumption = identity.)
Lots of the worst criminals have tragic back stories. Maybe demented by childhood trauma. Maybe they never had a chance due to sharing genetics with their abusers.
Heck, for all we know, Rowling might have some sort of trauma that helped shaped her into one of today’s leading assholes.
What I do know is that Rowling doesn’t seem to have broken any laws, but I have been told that Michael had individual victims whose lives he likely altered for the worse with criminal actions. (I speak with a little hedging because I haven’t actually reviewed any of the most recent evidence against him.)
I’ll acknowledge that Michael broke laws while (the thoroughly vituperable) Rowling has not.
But I don’t hold that to be an arbiter of morality.For me it comes down more to how they seem to view other living beings.
Michael has no clear evidence of deliberate, knowing, harm. Yes, he should’ve known better, and without being in his head I can’t know for sure… But it seems to be plausible.Meanwhile J. K. (I feel more comfortable with a gender neutral name even now everyone knows me but gender bending is right out) Rowling has made it clear that she doesn’t value trans-people as much as cos-people and is willing to set up conditions which greatly increase sexual assault against trans-women if it might only slightly reduce the threat of sexual assault against a single cos-woman, and does not find issue with cooperating with actual neo-nazis and crypto fascists who have strong misogynistic and homophobic stances on anti-trans issues - despite claiming she doesn’t want to harm those groups. She is choosing to value particular groups and ignore, and create, suffering for others she seems abhuman. (And yes she has a tragic back-story of an abusive husband and marital rape, which she says is why she must ensure gender is immutable.)
But - evil and harm can’t be compared and the totally different natures of what they do make comparison even more pointless.
If you continue to enjoy either of their work (or that of any other harmful person, be it Marquis de Sade, H. P. Lovecraft, or whomever) more power to you - but just try your best not to fund She Who Shall Not be Named’s warchest.If you continue to enjoy either of their work (or that of any other harmful person, be it Marquis de Sade, H. P. Lovecraft, or whomever) more power to you - but just try your best not to fund She Who Shall Not be Named’s warchest.
Absolutely. This is a fantastic reason to pirate certain material. I’m all for paying the owners and creators of materials I enjoy for said material, but there are exceptions.
I think there is a very big difference between listening to Michael Jackson’s music in 2026 and engaging with the Harry Potter universe in 2026.
Michael Jackson is dead, so any money going to his estate isn’t actively being used anymore for malicious purposes. JK Rowling is very much still alive, and actively using her position and wealth to try and eliminate trans people from public life.
Any money going to Harry Potter is also money going to JK Rowling and therefor supports transphobia
I can appreciate the importance of Harry Potter to my childhood. I even own the movies, purchased well over a decade ago, so I wouldn’t feel bad rewatching them. If I ever felt inclined to re-read them I’d thrift or go to the library.
But I will never give her another red dime of my money or consume any of the new media. As long as I live I will not give the franchise any of money.
While I agree with you, this is a clear joke :)
And also, JK Rowling has zero consistency and her logic is often current event specific.
Plenty of “established rules” are bent or changed for convenience in the moment or for a specific plot point
Jokes can’t really be funny to me if they don’t make any sense. They need to be based in reality (or in this case the reality of HP)
It’s funny to people who don’t care about HP. And arguing about reality of HP is like arguing about the reality of some other shitty fantasy I didn’t read.
I don’t care about HP and it’s fantasy rules, and make fun of it without an encyclopedic knowledge.
I’ve hated Harry Potter since the very first stupid film. It’s crap
The books, if it gets kids to read it’s fine with me
However, there is also the concept of silently casting spells.
It’s almost like Rowling is not the brilliant world builder that folks like Tolkien and Assimov are.
Cribbing half of one’s world from the real-life middle ages and the other half from the real-life 1990s does tend to paper over a lot of one’s shortcomings.
Wands are optional too, the only thing you have to do is think about something. But then Harry finds a book with a spell and without knowing what its effect are he uses it and Malfoy almost bleeds to death. The magic system just doesn’t make any sense.
Wasn’t there also something about intention? Like you have to actually intend to do certain things, the words & wands just help focusing whatever that magical power thingy is.
In canon a wand is also a european invention, in many other cultures its optional and using your hands the norm.
So is in Europe, it’s mentioned that powerful wizards don’t need them.
Yes and I mentioned that very thing, intention, in the comment you replied to. I thought it was pretty plainly written but at least two people completely missed it based on their replies.
Ah sorry, my brain tends to skip things for some reason
Sir, this is a meme
This is fucking funny.
And fuck J.K. Rowling.
“Here kid, have a gun. Don’t worry best you can do is give me a nosebleed. You’ll learn how to really kill people after you graduate from gun school.”
There’s an edit of the first movie where they just use guns. They float the feather by shot-juggling it.
After a quick search I found a copy - I lost it at “There’s a troll in the dungeon! [BLAM]” Harry Potter and the Deathly Weapons
I want to watch it, but the video quality and frames keeps shitting the bed.
This is amazing, and wow what a great video site!
“We’re gonna teach you the words to the spell to kill people when you’re 14, since that’s a ripe and mature age and kids are responsible by then. It’s nbd, it’s not like we’re gonna let you practice the spell or anything, and kids don’t just try dumb things outside of class!”
Never point your wand at something you don’t intend to curse!
Also, fuck J.K. Rowling.
#GoldStarLesbian
We need to stop referencing this problematic IP, and its problematic author, and just let the whole damn thing slide into obscurity.
As much as I loathe the author and mundanely feel indifferent towards the franchise, I can’t agree. It makes me think of H.P. Lovecraft who was far more problematic and yet I wouldn’t want his works to be lost. Granted, he was poor during his lifetime, so he didn’t spread his hate as much, but that’s besides the point.
If anything let’s keep infringing on her IP!
Lovecraft is dead, meaning he can’t hurt anyone. Rowling actively uses the money she makes off the franchise to hurt people, and even the most indirect forms of advertisement for her IP ultimately help her profit and then use those profits to do harm.
You can’t use that excuse, it’s like saying hitler is dead so I can enjoy his art. Please so not let your need to be right to obfuscate what’s moral.
If Hitler created any great art, it would be okay to acknowledge that. He famously didn’t, though.
J.K. Rowling is alive and doing active harm with the money she makes. And if you financially support her, whether directly or indirectly, you are helping her do harm.
The difference is that Lovecraft is dead and no longer benefits from any sales or attention. JKR is, unfortunately, still alive and actively spreading as much misery as possible. Considering that there’s a massive advertising push for the new show, we don’t need to do their marketing for them by also spreading comics.
Where did you hear this?
Lovecraft never made very much money, he was always poor and he died poor.
that’s besides the point
I don’t think it is. Giving money to Rowling, directly or indirectly, is to hurt our trans siblings. Buying The Call of Cthulhu won’t do that.
H.P. Lovecraft never funded campaigns that made the state strip the rights of non-white people.
He is nowhere near more problematic, JK actively hurts people and is 100% responsible for trans deaths.
Lovecraft was possibly the only instance where it legitimately was fear driving his xenophobia and not hatred. The man was completely and irrationally terrified of everything from air conditioners to mathematics that wasnt on a 2d plane to black people and eventually learned later in life that what scared him previously wasn’t actually scary.
He also wasn’t a billionaire actively throwing his money and notoriety behind hate groups specifically swaying legislation and public opinion to bring harm to people.
Yeah, let’s not give her any money, but the world is interesting, and fan work on it is also cool
Isn’t the killing curse “AVADAkadavra?”
Harry’s got a lisp in this universe. Don’t be an ableist.
/s
Atsa cadaver
transrights
I don’t understand, did he just kill Ron with Abra Kadabra? Because that is very decidedly not the killing curse. The entire point is that it sounds similar, but those are clearly not the words.
The point of Avada Kadavera is that muggles were so used to being killed out of hand by wizards that they associated the death curse with what would become the standard generic magic phrase.
Anyways, intent clearly matters for the spell more than the exact words or accents (directly canonically confirmed btw, not just implied by the books), which is why wizards can master casting spells without using words at all and they don’t all have to pronounce spells the exact same way. This also implies that Abra Kadabra might well be simply how that spell is pronounced in different regions, since we also know that there’s not some ancient magic speech/true speech going on, wizards can both create new spells and the foreign wizards use different linguistic conceits for their spells
This all clearly means Harry Potter wanted to murder Ron and not that it’s a silly comic making a silly joke.
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