Chain shot but it has to be fired from a double barrel cannon
If you made this today, but with precision ignition system and lightweight ultra high tensile wire rope, it would be catastrophic for that cow.
You mean it would be killed more instantaneously?
i had this idea: maybe one could achieve simultaneous firing by using only one combustion chamber with pressure valves that open channels to the cannon balls
Thing is, the cannon ball IS the pressure valve. And since one of them will invariably go faster than the other one, the whole thing will be even less unpredictable with one half of the chain still in the barrel
then just make it so the canonball is NOT the pressure valve. tge way i see it is you just gotta let tge explosion build up for a bit so the pressure equalizes
Or why not load them linearly into a single barrel. It’d shoot out straight but would likely develop asymmetries and build up a moment of inertia eventually resulting in the bolas motion they’re likely intending.
That’s what you normally do with chain shot. Unless that was the joke, of course.
Ah TIL
Test fired in Georgia, cow remains raining clear up in Maine.
“It blew up and almost killed us, perfect.”
From the descriptions of the aftermath, I can see where the mangler squigs got their inspiration from.
It fucking depends on the target weakness bro.
Mats and spars? Bar.
Rigging? Chain.
Crew during close action? Grape.
Clearing the decks with the quarterdeck swivel gun before boarding? Canister.
Hulling below the water line, long distance attempts, and knocking away their guns? Round.
All my homies love grape shot
Op tech
I gotta go with round shot.
it really says “fuck you and your boat, I don’t even want to steal it from you”
Carcass is cool too I guess. But it’s no 6” hole punched through the hull.
Ball gang rise up. It’s iconic, and dismembered men in formations wholesale, and knocked them down to boot. There’s usually no need for the rest of these innovative horrors, they just seem unsporting.
Pilk?
Now with Vitamin R!
That’s Palk™️
Chocolate?!
So… Ranch dressing?
bar shot, because it also implies the existence of giants with piercings
I’m just imagining giantess pierced nipples
My day has markedly improved. I be in my bunk
Cross their T and rake the decks with grape shot!
Best one is a round shot, but only if Baron Munchausen is ridding it.
Loved this Gilliam banger as a kid. Robin Williams, Uma Thurman, and Gilliam’s Monty Python alum Eric Idle are in it for those who haven’t seen. As an adult I see a lot of parallels with that movie and Tarsem’s “The Fall” (2006). They’re giving hopeful yet melancholic fairy tale energy.
We had a copy of this on vhs as a kid, grew up with it on repeat.
shibari shot~~~
I came here for the drink damnit. I want something that does this
Its effects are similar to “having your brains smashed out by a slice of lemon wrapped round a large gold brick.”
I think my cousin created a drink based on this; red bull, bacardi lemon and that weird stuff with the gold flakes in it iirc
that sounds pretty good, I’ll have to try it sometime
Can someone make an copy of this but bar shot is clearly a nipple peircing.
Okay, so each has its use but I would offer this assuming we’re in a stern chase. Chain and bar to disable or at least lower speed and maneuverability so that the foe is unable to escape. Rake the stern with round to disable guns as you come up alongside, if you’re able to slow them enough, try to get raking shots from both broadsides by zig zagging your course. Canister and grape from your upper deck guns to sweep the foe if you intend to carry them via boarding, if not pound away with round shot and if you can, rake them again from forward if you over haul.
Don’t forget Hot Shot (heated shot).
Langrage.
Kind of just the kitchen sink of whatever the fuck you had around. Often used by pirates because at close range when attempting to board you can shred a lot more people and also do a lot of damage to sails in quick time
No minié ball? GTFO
Pretty sure they never made Minié balls for cannons.
Correct, If a shitpost is making me use out of time and place cannons, then I’m using minié balls.
