I didn’t want to irritate any Italians by breaking spaghetti, so I purchased a device that lets you easily cook full-length spaghetti in the microwave.
è tempo di purificazione!I’m not gonna say that you need to be purified (you need to, tho), but hey… at least you are not setting your kitchen in fire because you decided to boil your pasta WITHOUT FUCKING WATER!
Oh dude I had a roommate who did not cook. He took one my good pans and made spaghettios in it. Then left the pan on low for six hours. I told him to eat it or throw it away, he said it was okay. I told him if he boiled off all the liquid and burned it, he was not getting another chance to clean it poorly. he was buying me a new pan, and I was choosing an expensive one. Guess who got a new pan.
How?Not even one person, but three have never seen anyone prepare either pasta or noodles till their 20’s?? And even if not, It’s pretty obvious… These
kidsadults don’t deserve to be exchange students. Better give that spot to someone else
You should really stop microwaveing plastic.
Why?
It turns your testicles into tits. And vise versa.
Brb, putting as much plastic as I can find in my microwave.
You do you dudebabe
Got converted to the church of snapping spaghetti by persians doing it and telling me that they give a donkey’s cock about what Italians think
Take it a step further and cut it up into small pieces in your bowl. That way you can eat it like regular food instead of having to dance with it first. That was my childhood solution, at least. Now I just buy other pasta shapes instead.
I don’t mind the dance, it’s just easier to cook them when they’re snapped.
Other pasta shapes rule btw
Elbows and shells ftw
Cavatappi
Yeah, those too
Sure your nonna wouldn’t stand for it but my gran told me the gays shouldn’t be allowed to marry.
They’re not to be trusted
Linguini > spaghetti
Superior shape and thickness
I do break it though. Purge away. The goal is smaller bites. Oh, and I also use the whole grain pasta. Pasta on its own is bad, but I don’t want to give it up, so I try to mitigate the damages as best I can.
I’ve been on a cavatappi kick lately. Think spiral penned.
Tube pastas are the best at holding on to the sauce
We got them!!! We got them!!
Yup. Linguini or spaghettini.
Not spaghetti.
Just put it upright in the pot and it’ll lower by itself. You won’t even notice a difference that one side was cooked that tiny bit longer.
You also get to salute the spaghetti as it lowers itself into the pot.
I mostly just push it further in every minute or so because I don’t want to wait.
Like smothering a loved one with a pillow.
Look, mate, it’s simple: if you break it you won’t be able to properly emulate the spaghetti kiss scene from The Lady And The Tramp because it will be too short.
So keep it in mind if you’re a dog and you want to romance a bitch.
I used a coffee maker for 10 years and to replace it my in-laws got me a nice espresso machine. They’re into coffee. I am not.
See, I’d always make a pot of black coffee and pour it into some instant hot cocoa instead of cream and sugar.
When I do the same with fancy espresso shots now I feel like I am directly assaulting Italia.
When Angelo Moriondo invented what ultimately became the espresso machine, he didn’t do it to make coffee fancier, or better, or more exclusive, or more pure. He did it specifically to make coffee faster. Absolutely every other aspect of an espresso shot is a total afterthought.
Remember that the next time some pretentious dingus in a turtleneck is prattling at you about goddamn beans.
(And while we’re at it, nobody in Italy used a tomato for anything until, near as we can determine, the 1540s. Tomatoes came from the new world; they didn’t exist in Europe until they were brought back there. Anyone claiming that their modern tomato based Italian cookery is proud tradition dating back to antiquity is thus likewise full of it.)
He did it specifically to *make coffee faster.
That’s why he gave it that name. And not the supremo or whatever. It was the quick coffee machine.
I dunno though, Italy didn’t even form as a kingdom until the 1860s, so an entire culture formed as an afterthought seems perfectly Italian.
Tomatoes came from Mexico to be exact.
See, I’d always make a pot of black coffee and pour it into some instant hot cocoa instead of cream and sugar.
Nah, just call it a mocaccino and you’re good.
I also love adult chocolate milk
I also love
adult chocolate milkStarbucks
That is not how spaghetti breaks:
https://www.youtube.com/shorts/fNtzwdFR1EYI do this too… and then I fry them until they are crunchy. I call the dish “The angry Italian”.
You know, they are crunchy right out of the package.
🤣
That’s the bad kind of crunchy. I want the good one. The “corner piece of the casserole” kind.
Recently, I learned that a common way to prepare rice is to first fry it in oil before you cook it (for Pilaf dishes, if I understand correctly).
And yeah, when I actually tried it, I certainly felt your comment. Like, how much more crunchy do I make them before adding the water?
a common way
You mean there are other ways?
Yeah, you ever tried to make the most bland and tasteless rice possible? It’s a really popular way of preparing rice here in Germany.
And well, that’s one of the steps, to not fry it.
Also you can make really good fried rice in like 30 mins by frying the raw grains (in oil) till they brown and smell toasty before you add the water to boil and steam it the rest of the way cooked.
1:2 rice:water fry for 10 mims, boil for 10 mins, kill the heat and steam for 10 mins, et voilla, perfect fresh fried rice.
(Stir in the add ins and other flavour stuff once it’s finished steaming, they’ll burn or get mushy, bland and weird if you add them to the oil or the water.)
Italiakisoba.
Well, the Italians do that as well (the last part). It is called Spaghetti all’assassina.
Some very southern Italians do. I think we’re talking Puglia. And it is awesome. Especially with some n’duja in the sauce.
Also crunchy refried pasta left over from yesterday.
Thats me. I always break my spaghetti in half for storage and cooking. Much easier to deal with
Better a happy heretic than a zoned out zealot
All spaghetti is eventually broken, all you’re doing is changing where that happens in the process.
All spaghetti is turned to shit eventually. I also like that to happen later in the process 😝
Not approved 🤌
At this point you could directly use Gemelli, Farfalle, Fusilli or other types of short pasta. It has the additional advantage that more of the sauce sticks on the noodles, which is tastier.
Otherwise the fun with xxl spaghetti is that you can move the whole plate of pasta with a single twist of the fork.
I only break spaghetti because my mother claims she can’t eat it otherwise.
Well, that’s to be expected. This is blasphemy.
Tastier if you break them into thirds instead.
