Sub beats wrap
⬆️ take it and go you animal.
The man who was hit with the sandwich was CBP agent Gregory Lairmore, who told the jury earlier this week that the sandwich “kind of exploded all over my uniform” and “smelled of onions and mustard”, according to the Washington Post. The defense pushed back, as it appeared in imagery from the scene that the sandwich did not leave its wrapper.
LOL, how is this not The Onion?
Anyway, it’d be nice to be able to sue the shit out of those responsible for wasting this guy’s time, reinstall him in his job, and give him all back pay.
Now sue them for $.
Or politicians need to be forced to vote to remove this immunity BS. We need to push for that and the removal of citizens United.
I was just wondering if he could sue for malicious prosecution.
… and can the police officer who LIED (perjured himself) when saying the sandwich “exploded all over” be privately charged if the court won’t do it themselves?
Who knows but if he does they should bar the agent and lawyer that brought up the charges from ever bringing charges again on anybody.
He probably can’t. Absurd as it may sound, he was actually guilty.
Here are model jury instructions for the charge, which include:
There is a forcible assault when one person intentionally strikes another
It doesn’t say that the victim must be struck with something very likely to injure them. Looking at the statute, it turns out that actual physical contact (rather than making a threat without contact) elevates it to a felony - the charge a grand jury previously rejected.
Of course, prosecutors normally apply common sense to charging decisions and don’t prosecute everything that technically qualifies under the strictest reading of a statute.
I don’t mean to be a pedant here, but he’s not actually guilty. The jury decided that.
Did he literally throw a sandwich? Yes.
Is he guilty of forcible assault by throwing the sandwich? No.
If doing a thing was the same as guilt there wouldn’t be a trial.
No, he sues for damages. Time lost, mental anguish, etc
“This, ladies and gentlemen of the jury, is about a sandwich” and after the federal agent claimed to have been smeared with mustard and onions, the defense showed a picture of the sandwich - still completely in its wrapper.
“If the wrapper is still fit, you must acquit!”
Were in a world where I can’t tell if this is legit or not.
I’m glad DC juries aren’t putting up with Trump and Bondi’s fascist shit
The random sample survey of 604 D.C. residents was taken between August 14 and 17 shortly after Trump signed the executive order. It indicates some 65 percent of residents do not believe the presence of FBI agents and uniformed National Guard troops from an increasing number of states makes the city safer.
Eight of 10 residents surveyed oppose Trump’s executive order to federalize law enforcement in the city. Seven in 10 oppose it “strongly.”
I’m not sure why they thought a DC jury would ever convict, given that even a DC grand jury (which hears only the prosecutor’s side) didn’t indict.
The grand jury didn’t really have any choice: it was a turkey sandwich, and they only indict ham.
I wish in cases like these, the jury could sanction the prosecution, like not guilty, and we revoke your right to practice law for 90 days for being such fucking idiots and harming the accused, and wasting our fucking time.
Also just further on this… think of how many frivilious law suits could be prevented with that. Don’t let the jury block them for a year, and maybe keep a harsher thing like 90 days for state/feds, but imagine if someone hires a lawyer to sue someone for something absolutely ridiculous, and they knew they would risk not being able to practice law for a week if they offend the jury for how stupid it was.
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In Toronto we had officer bubbles, a cop telling protester blowing bubbles “if any of those bubbles touch me it’s assault on an officer” dude was a national joke
Dear god, i’ve been assaulted thousands of times and didn’t even know it!
This is my metoo moment!
Does a subway sandwich qualify as food?
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I dunno… i think there could be an issue if you throw something like a moldy tomato at someone, that they could claim a health risk due to the mold for example, so might wanna make sure it’s actually human safe, even if it’s no longer worth eating.
Man frowns at MAGA.
Republicans: he assaulted me! Lock him up!
I revel in the fact that the cop is going to get roasted for this through out his career. We should start emailing quality puns to the department so they don’t run out of fodder too quick.
Please share the email address
*toasted
Time to make more sandwiches and milkshakes
Why milkshakes :(
Maybe do something thst isnt so harmful to the climate tho? Like a tomato shake?
Ok look, you got a good heart and you know that dairy isn’t good for the environment or cows and so on. Cool.
But perfect is the enemy of action. You know how there’s no ethical consumption under capitalism? So there’s always going to be some way to nitpick about any action. For example, that tomato shake was made with migrant or prisoner or slave labor and mass farming is also terrible for the environment and water consumption.
One of the biggest strategic flaws we have on the left is that we care a lot about all sorts of stuff and want to do right by the world, which leads us to sometimes criticizing our own methods and people over what could be better and what is worse, and we lose sight of the bigger picture. Sometimes this is from genuinely wanting things to be better and sometimes it’s from trying to show how much better and more woke we are. It almost always comes off as flexing, a holier-than-thou attitude.
Functionally it causes division and inaction.
Sure, sometimes we need to adjust a strategy and try to make things better, but we need to look at the bigger picture and not get lost in the weeds.
An imperfect ally is still an ally and should be accepted, as it’s better than no ally. An imperfect tactic should be accepted, because that’s better than inaction.
So if you want to throw your tomato drink at someone go for it, but don’t discourage people from actively fighting Nazis, ok? Maybe next time say “I don’t like using milk I’m going for v8”, it’s more proactive and less critical.
This is preposterous! It’s a dangerous ruling! If this is truly how it’s going to go, then people will start buying subs and throwing them at ice thugs every da…
I withdraw my comment and give back the rest of my time.
Of assault… but what about the pepper?
Producer Amy Pascal threw a sandwich at producer Kevin Feige over a disagreement about bringing Spiderman into the MCU
lol
