Ambitious is too broad a word for this guy’s argument.
What if I had a deep, insatiable ambition to promote and integrate renewable energy, or to run a humane and non-profit animal shelter, or to study particle physics?
Those are all great goals to have.
But yeah, fuck corpos. Remember, all: vote with your wallet!
As long as the intention is to try and make the world a better place, I agree.
I’d take ambition motivated by passion, not by greed. Wanna be the best concert violinist in the world and put Itzhak Perlman to shame? Absolutely. Want to change the scientific world like Curie, Faraday? Be my guest. But if your goal is money, market share, or capital, gtfo my face and swipe left
For me, it’s more about competence. I don’t care that much about what you want to do with the skill, but if you’ve dedicated time to become really good at something useful, that’s pretty attractive.
I think “passion, not by greed” is exactly what bothers me about this post, well said.
I’m sorry, I’ve got to push back against the idea that “ambitious” means striving to be rich. Fuck that.
My entire adult dating life before finding my monogamous forever partner, I was very much attracted to intelligence, competence, organization, high executive function, and optimism. Those character traits often combined into what is normally known as ambition.
That’s what I’m attracted to.
And yes, if I met someone who had fallen for that hustle culture nonsense, or talked like a LinkedIn post, or even seemed to place a high priority on money, that’s a huge turnoff. So the examples given in the screenshot are gross and unattractive. But the people I am attracted to are still clearly “ambitious” in what I consider a healthy way.
So no, I’d like to reclaim the word “ambitious” away from however this screenshotted post is using it.
I would love to meet somebody like that, but I always feel like they’d never date me.
What’s holding you back from being the person they’d date?
(Btw there is some good advice in that question that can help you identify what fears and procrastination that keeps you away from what you want to be, but there’s also a potential trap in determining your worth by external factors)
Well, the whole thing is premised on a cognitive distortion in the first place. I don’t know what kind of person they would date.
Yes also that, but reducing it to “they could be into anything, and there’s an equal chance just like everyone else that theyd be into me” is also a cognitive distortion right?
It’s a lot easier when you’re in a social circle where most people (regardless of gender or sexual orientation) are already like that.
I’ve lived in rural places where the dominant industry skews blue collar and less educated, and it was a bit harder to find my people in that kind of community. But I still found a good friend group in that environment. Dating scene was pretty abysmal, though, and I spent most of my time single.
I’ve also lived in places and contexts where it’s the opposite. There are university towns where most people in their late 20’s are grad students or faculty, lab towns with a disproportionate number of Ph.D wielding scientists, tech cities where software engineer seems to be the most common job, big cities where you’re running shoulders with people from all walks of life and employed in all sorts of industries, etc.
I’ve lived in a lot of these types of places and if you’re in the right environment (and you’re social enough to where you can make new friends easily), getting plugged into the right social group makes it easier to meet and date people who fit what you’re looking for.
I remember okcupid had a question (back when their system was based on answering questions) that asked “is it possible for a partner to be too ambitious?”
I was like “clearly some of you assholes never read Macbeth”.
Also, the CEO of my old job was on the dating apps at the same time as me. Despite us being about the same age, I’m confident very few people would match with both of us. “Never worked, just grad school and CEO founder” seekers don’t also seek me.
Being ambitious isn’t always about becoming rich, just so you know. “I want to win gold at the olympics” is ambitious. “I want to join the Cirque du Soleil” is ambitious. Wanting to be among the best of any given field is ambitious and not necessarily about money.
i want to be the very best…
Like no one ever was
Hell my ambition for starting my business was so that way my family didn’t have to worry about paying rent every month and I didn’t have to worry about how I was going to feed my kids. If I become rich awesome if I can pay my bills and afford to live That’s the goal.
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“He vampired billionairely across the room, his sweetly-softcore rapey vibes engulfed her small feminine self-inserty hair, she looked exactly like [you, the girl reading this], and he was very vampirey and mysterious…”
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I love an ambitious person. Just not if the main motivation is money, fame, beauty, or status. But give me someone geeky, curious, and exploring person anytime.
ambitious lioe “I want to reach my goals” feels… fair?
Teenage me was not ready for Johnny Silverhand to become a household name.
Rock on rockerboy.
I want to start a tech coop, and get it off the ground.
Is that like one of those factory farm situations but instead of battery chickens, it’s just tech bros in the cages?
Nah, it has tech queers instead of tech bros.
I actually do want to join one of those. I looked high and low and the closest I could find were regular tech startups. Currently working at one.
I’d encourage my tech wife to work at one of those unlike a startup
Startups are suspicious by default. When you actually want to make a difference, you start a coop, a non-profit, or a non-profit coop.
Exactly. Some developer cultures I’ve been in were completely saturated with startup brain. Everybody builds something and immediately thinks “Okay, how can I make money off of this?”
As HPMOR’s Quirrel/Voldemort would say, these people are ambitious but have no ambition - just following the path society hands to them.
Ambition can be really cool, in fact, it’s a good idea to have an ambitious goal that motivates the path of your life.
There’s an xkcd that talks about wanting nothing to do with people who care more about success itself than the thing they intend to be successful in.
If you live and breathe music and want to pursue that as a lifelong passion, seeking success in that field is admirable. Same with professional athletes, artists, authors, doctors, engineers, chefs, farmers. I love to see people who love their craft, and there’s no shame in wanting to be great at it.
But people who want success in something and then try to find that something to be successful at? Those people are losers.
Yeah I’ve been flirting with a couple lately and one of them is in grad school which is hot as fuck. The other does her trade at home for fun, which is also very attractive.
Honestly wanting success but not caring how is only matched in unattractiveness with not caring about anything enough to try to be good at it. Hell even being a jack of all trades is hot. My ex was no farmer or carpenter, but she gardened, built her own bed, and had just gathered various other skills wherever she could find them.
“I’d like to get my tech start up off the ground” and “its my dream to become a billionaire” are two extraordinarily different things.
OP, just curious, which version of that song was going through your head for the title?
Little V’s cover.
I had no idea he existed, but that was a dope ass cover. I’ll check his other stuff out, thanks!
I have no idea how I didn’t know he covered that song but thank you for making me aware.
The most based version
I want to bring bullet-hell genre to VR with new movement controls someday but idk if that falls in ambitious or whimsical category.
