• deft@lemmy.wtfEnglish
    38·
    2 months ago

    I’m gonna help y’all out.

    Ren faires, local volunteer theaters, trivia nights, local crafts fair.

    Don’t go there to pick people up, go there to engage and have fun. Being interested and having fun is far more attractive than trying to pick someone up.

    If all else fails, host a queer friendly D&D group.

    That’s where I’ve met every polyamorous, cool nerd person I know. Most mature, interesting and down to earth people you’ll know. I know one polycule that consists of a programmer, a plumber and a chef, they take kickboxing together and have a sweet garden. I swear they’re prepping for the apocalypse together.

      • sinwell@infosec.pubEnglish
        11·
        2 months ago

        Yeah and I wish more of the shut-in nerds would come out to play with us

        Text < Phone < Video < … < In-Person

        Especially when it comes to interpersonal connection and chemistry

          • sinwell@infosec.pubEnglish
            7·
            2 months ago

            I think you’re right. All the above. It will be jarring to leave a familiar social medium and there will be friction. Worth it though I think.

            Online social media (including this one) are like processed snacks in many ways. They replicate and augment elements of social experience the way processed food imitates real food. They offer push-button control, promising to vend whatever social experience you wish.

            Suddenly switching from a diet of only processed snacks to 100% real food can cause a great deal of discomfort, enough that a person might just give up and go back to the snacks.

            TLDR For the exclusively online socialites, it might be more manageable to plan in a reasonable online-to-IRL adjustment phase rather than just unplugging yourself from the matrix and charging out like a champ

    • boonhet@lemmy.zipEnglish
      5·
      2 months ago

      See I keep hearing about ren faires online but never heard of one irl. How do I even find one?

      Like there’s the Medieval Days in Tallinn but that sounds super official, the performers are in character and everyone else is mostly a spectator

      Are regular renaissance fairs where people get in character just an American thing?

      • deft@lemmy.wtfEnglish
        2·
        2 months ago

        No idea I just know of the one near myself and others speak of them so they must exist. I would honestly just ask around at nerd locations, Google, some areas have like a parks&rec kinda place you can call they might know.

        Also if you do call, ask if they offer anything. My local parks shit will literally give out free tickets to theme parks and shit if you call and ask.

  • StabbingSky@lemmy.zipEnglish
    4·
    2 months ago

    That was true for band nerds too. The only period in my life where I had any game was when I attended band camp. And they sought me out.