COBOL joke from 1999:

A COBOL programmer, tired of all the extra work and chaos caused by the impending Y2K bug, decides to have himself cryogenically frozen for a year so he can skip all of it.

He gets himself frozen, and eventually is woken up when several scientists open his cryo-pod.

“Did I sleep through Y2K? Is it the year 2000?”, he asks.

The scientists nervously look at each other. Finally, one of them says “Actually, it’s the year 9999. We hear you know COBOL.”

    • lorty@lemmy.ml
      7·
      25 days ago

      COBOL itself isn’t really that bad. It’s the lack of modern toolling you’d expect that will make you tear your hair apart. And also JCL. Fuck JCL.

    • jimmy90@lemmy.world
      2·
      24 days ago

      there will be lots of systems in shit old languages being nursed along because nobody dare rewrite them because the engineering is so awful

      take your pick

      • gravitas_deficiency@sh.itjust.worksEnglish
        2·
        24 days ago

        because the engineering is so awful

        because the engineering was perfect and nobody has had to touch it since it was written

        Seriously, that’s why bank stuff still has COBOL stacks. It’s worked perfectly for like half a century.

    • Agent641@lemmy.world
      11·
      25 days ago

      It’s a meme video, there is an altercation in a McDonald’s, loud and violent, but the guy in the foreground continues eating completely nonplussed with big capybara energy about the punch-up going on next to him.

      • Avicenna@programming.dev
        1·
        24 days ago

        I think I have seen versions from the same restaurant but another person sitting calmly. But maybe I am wrong