Made his living scamming elderly fixed income nincompoops.

But what about weaponized antibiotic resistant plague?

TSA has confiscated so many swiss army knives from me. I always keep one in my pocket and feel almost naked without one. I don’t feel like my pocket knife is as big of a threat to a plane as my cellphone battery is.

That’s a great description of him. At least he’s dead.

Which is why billionaire T. Boone Pickens bought a ton of water rights back in the 90s and early 2000s. NY Times late to the party as usual.

Gas hitting $9 per gallon should drive some ridership and increase property values near stations.

Reboots some switches is a pro.

I am more scared of US Senators that are dumber than my cat.

Why is our recidivism rate so terrible?

What’s that? You have a criminal record? Sorry, I can’t risk hiring you.

Only 6.9 killowatt hours to come up with that recommendation. A bargain.

Did anyone ask him about couch fuckers? Seems like a logical follow up.

Police indifference to parking violations probably translates to police indifference towards vandalism. I carry a pocket knife. Two flats requires a tow.

They both suck. She initiated the physical confrontation. He went too far. She went back for more grabbing a weapon (the bottle) when it was clear she was out matched. A night in the drunk tank would be good for both of them.

I can’t think of any aspect of The Last of Us that didn’t appear in an earlier game. It was well enough done, but I don’t feel like it was innovative in any way.

If Trump was strait, he wouldn’t be blowing Bubba.

I think it depends on where you live. I have visited places where summer is the best season. I live where summer is the worst season.

“It’s fucking insane that you assholes are more worried about whether some trans girl can play badminton than you are about the naked grift our pedophile president engages in at every opportunity.”

Man, I feel like my alibi is terrible.

One tried to attack my son when he was about 6 while we were walking in a park, not particularly close to where it started. I reminded it of which species eats the other species by kicking it in its stupid bill. It backed off. I was prepared to kill it.

Finally my opportunity to punish every bit of conservative drivel it puts in my feed.