I always played the roses.

For the love of God, Anakin!

They were young and zombie movies were everywhere. In the way of all children, the questions were non-stop. This was also the time I was bedridden, so I convinced them that zombies only went after healthy people.

I have trained my children from a young age that, in case of zombie outbreak or alien invasion, I am to be left behind. I require far too many medications to function in a post-apocalyptic setting.

Sounds like something for Chuck Tingle.

I remembered a worse time (than being the one who kills access):

One of my vendors had won the contract that my company currently held with an automaker. It was told to me in confidence, as they thought it was going to be announced later that month. I was also told because they were looking to hire me to keep all the day-to-day knowledge.

It was finally announced… EIGHT. MONTHS. LATER.

While I never said anything (it could have tucked a major deal and got myself and a few others in legal hot water), I was always quick to counsel my underlings to move to other positions or get jobs somewhere else.

My brother was on the list of names once.

I was not allowed to tell him, but HR let me take off that day and had someone else do it.

I remember being the server guy who had to stay late on Fridays and remove access at 6pm.

I got a panicked call from someone who couldn’t save the file he was working on. It was for a project set to go live on Tuesday.

I had to break it to him that he was just let go.