Is there any other connection? I mean, Ohio is like the opposite of PR.

I want off this ride now

Does he think Puerto Rico is in Ohio?

He will become an even worse person.

Just remember that most people just wanna be entertained and talk about themselves. Ask regular questions that you wish someone would ask you, and you solve both of the challenges.

If you say or do something stupid, acknowledge it and move on with the rest of the day.

Follow through. If you say you will check out a book /show/movie/ band…actually do it, and be honest about what you think, it will give you something to talk about.

Try to have a question and a compliment on standby for everyone you see regularly. You might need to devote a few minutes to this daily but it’ll be worth it.

Never expect anyone to do anything for you and you won’t resent them when the inevitably don’t do anything for you. The people that actually do things for you despite your lack of expectation, probably genuinely like you and want to be around you.

Don’t apologize about everything you do but be sincere if you do apologize and then CHANGE YOUR BEHAVIOR.

I haven’t had a dream in 4 years.

I found a satanic trans-furry republican in my kids candy. It looked me in the eyes and said “eat a queer fetus for Jesus”

Thanks J’Biden

If you look closel, instead of calling it nut juice they just invented a new word: Almondmilk. Check your fridge (if you chug nut juice). The lawyer that came up with this deserves a dinosaur sticker on their hand.

Kinda like if I drink half of a 5 hour energy drink. Do I get 100% of the energy for 2.5 hours or 50% energy for 5 hours?

I think the ai bros decided to hit the gas on ai because it is 95% certain we will fail to stop runaway climate change and thus kill the entire planet whereas letting their superintelligence-in-development take control of everything at this crucial moment gives us a 87% chance of survival but also ensures they are able to finish their massive underground cities and automate as much as possible so they don’t need any poor, which is what the data centers are really for.

Thanks for coming to my Ted talk.

A healthy combination of stubborn tenacity and pathetic laziness really.

A YouTuber reminded me that in the 80’s we were all told we would die in a firey radioactive blast from Russia or slowly for starvation as the smoke from millions of city sized fires chokes the sun out of photosynthesis entirely, so…. Stil planning on one of those.

So when beds were held up with rope to support a sack of hay, a newly married couple would come to their honeymoon location and find their bed has be untied by family during the wedding. They would literally have to tie the knot to get into bed.

Hit the hay, and hit the sack used to involve whacking your hay with a detachable bedpost spire to knock the bugs living in it down to a bowl of oil under your bed.

Bonus: honeymoon got its name from the tradition of the bride eating honey for the first month of marriage to increase chances of conception.

If you can say Benedict Cumberbach or Timothy Chalemet you can say his name. English has the sounds already there, you just don’t want to do it.

leans on a cane made of candy tell me more about how presidents shouldn’t just make shit up because their brains are pudding

When people take this hard stance with trans rights (almost always men IME) it sure does feel like they’re saying “you’re gonna have to make trans people illegal so I stop watching trans porn. It’s the only way”

Not shaming anyone’s kink, just seems like a self control problem to me

Move to the couch or sleep the opposite way (head where feet usually go). If that doesn’t work I start organizing files on my pc. Brain will relent because it loathes file organizing

I’m not reading this because there is nothing useful.

I tell two lies for every truth I say to it. My profile is probably wildly wrong.

I feel like we will find malice was the motivator.